It's been a tough few weeks. The whole of May actually; I seem to have picked the worst month of my life to start blogging about exercise because I haven't really done any! I am trying though.
I recently started a new job and May to July is one of the busiest times of the year for my department. This has resulted in me working long, tiring hours with no lunch breaks and therefore my food and water routines have taken a turn for the worst. So I'm tired, thirsty and still I shove another danish into my pie-hole. I am also feeling the pinch of tightening purse strings and my long term relationship is at breaking point.
On Friday I was also let down by some people I thought may have been new work mates and with it all piling up on me I have been feeling a little sorry for myself. Sometimes life just seems surreal; as though all of these things can't possibly be happening at once.. There has to be something positive, right? Well, I did just get a promotion but unfortunately I do not have a clue how to do the job (yet) so I am getting nervous about that as the days draw closer. It means a lot of responsibility.
The weekend before last I was planning on going out for my first outdoor run, however I was so shattered and demotivated from a stressful week I decided to leave it for a while. Last weekend, I was still feeling pretty rough but by about 1pm on Sunday I dragged my butt out of the flat and walked up to Wimbledon Common. You have never known anyone to take so long getting ready; talk about procrastination! I was so nervous, worrying about everything. Should I take my phone/music? Should I go to Richmond Park instead? Should I take a water bottle? I knew I was tired and under-hydrated, I had felt a bit poorly the last week but finally I made it out of the door. I think even just leaving the flat and walking did me good and thankfully the Common was quite empty and I managed to find a route that was through the trees and off the main pathways.
It felt great to be outside jogging! Putting aside all the stupid worries I have about embarrassing myself in public. Who cares really? And who will remember 30 seconds later? Unfortunately I got distracted with trying to find my way around and getting lost and therefore I couldn't really relax and completely get into my stride, so I only managed 1.99km, which was 20 minutes of very slow jogging.
Another week passed of hectic-ness at work and I only managed a 30 minute cycle at the gym, however this weekend I tackled the outdoor run again. Today I was feeling much more awake and more confident. Luckily I woke up quite early and had the running bug already niggling at me so I decided to get ready and take to the nearby roads before the pedestrian traffic built up. I am lucky to live on a relatively long stretch of flattish road however, this is the first time I have had the courage to run truly in public. With cars and buses whizzing by too! Even a huge line of runners strode passed me (on the opposite side of the road, thank God!) I was very pleased with a constant easy run of 3.26km in 30 minutes. Not bad for a first timer! Now I have my route I can improve on my speed and distance. Bath Half Marathon, here I come!!
So what if everything else is shit and falling apart? I still have running and I shouldn't underestimate what that can do for a person. The first hurdle has been cleared and I am suddenly feeling confident again.